


selfish ambition

by JDKoopa



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Golden Deer Route, Jealousy, Love Confessions, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:02:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23398165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JDKoopa/pseuds/JDKoopa
Summary: Hilda and Claude discuss the things important to them
Relationships: Hilda Valentine Goneril/Claude von Riegan
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44
Collections: Those Who Drabble in the Dark - Guess the Author





	selfish ambition

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Felannie Discord Server Guess The Author Challenge. Prompt was: The Reasons Why.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy it!

“Claude, wait for me! You’re walking too fast!” Hilda jogged to catch up to the olive-skinned boy. “It’s been five years, the least you could do is walk with me instead of leaving me behind.”

Claude laughed, slowing his pace to match Hilda’s. “Alright, alright. I’d hate to make you sweat on our first day back together.” He winked at her, and Hilda felt warmth spreading to her cheeks. Had Claude gotten more attractive? Was he flirting with her?

Hilda shook her head, then realized Claude was looking at her. She quickly began swatting at an invisible insect. “Shoo, go away. Geez, this place really fell apart. I wonder what happened?”

“After Edelgard declared war, I’m sure everyone had other priorities. The war spread pretty quickly, and the knights have been busy looking for Rhea. Garreg Mach just slipped through the cracks.”

“I guess.” Hilda glanced at Claude nervously. “Now that you mention Rhea’s disappearance, something else has been bothering me. What happened to the professor? Why did she show up here today?” 

“Why are any of us here today?” Claude kicked a rock, and watched as it tumbled down the steps by their old dorms. “We promised we would meet here, so of course Teach made it.”

“Claude, you can’t really believe it’s as simple as that. No one has heard from her for 5 years. She disappeared in the middle of the Adrestian invasion. Do you expect me to believe she just appeared out of nowhere today to keep a promise?”

When Claude didn’t answer, Hilda stopped walking and crossed her arms, tapping her foot impatiently. Claude took a few more steps, then stopped with his back to her. “Promises are such strange things aren’t they? They’re so fragile, and once they’re broken it’s impossible to put them back together.”

“Claude, I’m being serious. I want you to tell me what’s going on. We gathered here because you wanted us to, even though the war is in full swing. Why was this so important? What does Byleth have to do with it?”

Claude sighed. He knelt and picked up another piece of rubble, tossing it into the air and catching it while he spoke. “I don’t know what happened to her, but I always believed that Byleth would make it here today. I had to. If she didn’t make it here today, I’m not sure what my future would look like, but now that she’s returned I have hope that I can reach my goals.”

“What are you talking about, Claude? What does Byleth have to do with your future?” Hilda knew she was angrier than she had a right to be, but she was tired of Claude dodging her questions. She wanted a straight answer for once. On top of that, she couldn’t fight back the feeling surging in her gut. Was that jealousy?

“I don’t know exactly. There’s just something different about her. I get the feeling she’s the key to making my dream a reality.” Claude finally turned to face Hilda, and for a second he smiled so big and looked so handsome that Hilda forgot to breathe. Then, his face warped with worry.

“Hilda? Is something wrong?’ Claude stepped toward her a little too quickly, and Hilda reflexively took a step back and turned away.

“N-nothing. I’m fine. We should finish our patrol. I’ll check over here, why don’t you look that way?” She looked away from Claude, feeling the stinging in her eyes. Byleth, who had vanished for 5 years without a trace, was the key to his dreams?

“Alright. I’ll uh… see you at dinner, then?” Claude began to reach out toward Hilda’s shoulder, but let his hand hover. Hilda could feel the tips of his fingers brush her skin lightly as he pulled his hand into a fist and let his arm fall to his side before walking away to finish the patrol.

After Claude’s footsteps receded, Hilda realized how childish she had been acting. Claude had called everyone together because he needed them. All of them, not just Byleth. This was no time to get jealous about feelings he might have for Byleth. Besides, Hilda didn’t have feelings for Claude in the first place, so why should she be jealous?

Hilda wiped her eyes, and was surprised when her fingertips were damp. Her mind went back to Claude and the way he was playing with the rubble around them while they were walking. That idiot, he must have kicked up enough dust that it was getting into her eyes. 

Hilda dried her fingers, then headed off to finish her patrol. As she walked, she decided not to worry about what Claude thought of her anymore. They would both be too busy to think about that over the next several months in any case.  
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Hilda looked down on Gronder field. The air was still as the sun dipped below the horizon in the distance. Several months after the class reunion, and flying under a new banner, they were nearing the end at last. 

"This is where it all started." Claude said, walking up next to her. "When we battled Dimitri and Edelgard here five years ago, I never expected things to come to this."

"If we win here tomorrow, we'll be one step closer to your dream." She looked over at him, expecting him to be happy. If they won here, they could march on the capital. If they succeeded there, Claude could begin reshaping the continent the way he wanted to. 

Instead, he looked distant. 

"Hey, Claude. Mr. I-Have-A-Scheme-For-Everything. Aren't you excited? You'll be able to make your dream a reality! A new Fódlan with open borders. Isn't that what this has all been about?"

She waited a few seconds for him to respond. Finally, she grew annoyed. She turned to walk away, until she felt something grab her hand.

"Hilda. Do you think I can do it?" Hilda wasn't sure she had heard him right. She studied his face. His expression, normally carefree and calm, was shaken. His eyes which usually pierced through her with such confidence, were now full of doubt.

"What are you talking about? Do I think you can win?" She didn't know what to say. She knew how to help Marianne when she was doubting herself, but the idea of helping Claude was so foreign. Hilda's brain moved at a snail's pace, trying to process the situation.

"Do you think I can rebuild Fódlan the way I want? Even if we win, the people might not change. On top of that, if the outside world doesn't accept the new Fódlan then it will have been a wasted effort."

Claude was still staring into the distance. The fading light of the sun put a golden aura around him, as if the heavens were giving him the blessing of the Golden Deer which was once their house symbol. His eyes, however, had no life in them. His unwavering bravado seemed to crumble on that hill.

"What are you talking about? You think I'm gonna let you waste the effort I've put into this?" Hilda's blood was boiling. She turned so she was fully facing Claude.

"We've been through a lot together. You've dragged us all over the nation in pursuit of your dream. You don't get to start doubting now. Besides, I thought Byleth gave you a future. Why don't you go to her for support?" 

She knew it was unfair, but his words still stung. The way he spoke with Byleth was so intimate. Why didn't he speak with her that way? 

"What? What does Byleth have to do with any of this?" Claude looked truly lost. Hilda couldn’t believe the stupid expression on his stupid face. 

“Don’t you remember what you said to me, when Byleth showed up out of nowhere after 5 years? When you told me she was the key to your future?”

“Are you mad about that?” Claude cocked his head slightly to the side, as if realizing for the first time that Hilda might be hurt by him saying something like that to her.

"YES!” Hilda accented her exclamation by smacking Claude’s chest. She hadn't let this train of thought bother her in a long time, but today she didn't fight the tears. “You know, for someone so smart, Claude, you're pretty dense." 

Hilda ran her hand through her hair, sighing in exasperation that Claude had brought her to this point. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself with little success, and stared at the sky. The embers of the sunset scattered across the clouds seemed to mirror the embers in her heart that she couldn’t fight anymore.

"Why does it have to be her? Why can't I be the one that helps you achieve your dreams? You invited me to meet your parents Claude! Yet she's still the one you see a future with!"

Hilda had forgotten Claude was still holding her other hand until he tightened his grip. "Is that what you think? You think I want to spend my life with Teach?" His voice was softer than she had expected. How was he so calm? 

"How could I not think that?” She laughed bitterly. “All you ever talk about is your ambition and how she can help fulfill it. Why don't you ask me about my dreams for once Claude? Or are you so self-absorbed that what I want doesn't matter?"

For a moment, Claude looked like he wanted to argue. He opened his mouth and closed it again, repeating the process three times before finally taking a deep breath of his own. His gaze returned to the sun in the distance which was now barely peeking over the hills.

"Hilda… what do you want?"

"I want to be with you! I want to see you reshape Fódlan, and then the world! I want to be by your side when you smile and say 'we finally did it.' To hold your hand and hear you say 'let's go home.' 

"I want to meet your parents and introduce you to my brother. I want to see you vulnerable like this and be able to make you feel more at ease. Why else would I have left everything behind and come back when you called?

"I want you, Claude!" 

Hilda wasn’t sure when it happened, but she must have moved toward Claude. His breath was warm and sweet, and it made her so mad. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to kill him or kiss him, or to just run away.

They stood there for what felt like a long time. The sun finally disappeared completely, leaving only the light of the moon and stars to illuminate them. Hilda knew she must look like a mess. Her nose was running, her lip was quivering. Her face was wet with tears and red from a combination of rage and embarrassment.

She tried to pull away, but Claude wouldn't let go. He just kept staring at her. What was Hilda thinking, saying all that? Why was Claude just staring? She could feel the seconds passing. 

"Will you say something, Claude?" She finally sobbed. She fell to her knees, still holding Claude's hand.

"Hilda." Claude's voice broke. He cleared his throat and tried to speak again. "Hilda, you don't really believe that you're not important to my dreams, do you?"

Hilda didn't answer. She was too busy counting the blades of grass on the hillside.

"When I said Byleth was important to my future, I meant my plans for Fódlan. Not my personal future."

Hilda looked up as Claude kneeled next to her. She held his gaze, trying to decide if he was telling the truth.

"What do you see for your personal future?" She asked, feeling her anger subsiding, a small flicker of hope taking its place.

"There's this girl I've had my eye on for a while. Some people might not see how hard she works, but that’s because they’re not looking closely enough. She's supportive and caring. When you give her a reason to act, nothing can stop her. She knows what's important and would do anything to protect that."

Hilda felt a smile forming on her lips. She let out a weak laugh.

"She's patient, too, I hope. I haven't told her yet how I feel about her, but someday soon I hope to. After the war ends, I want to take her home to my family and hopefully begin a life with her. Of all the reasons I want Fódlan to enter the world, many of which are for the people of Fódlan as a whole, she is my one selfish reason for hoping we can learn to break our borders."

Claude kissed her gently on the lips. It happened so fast Hilda wasn't sure it was real. Then, Claude helped her to her feet and they returned to camp. Hilda didn’t let go of his hand until they reached her tent and they parted ways for the night. 

When he got back to his own tent, Claude put his fingers on his mouth. He could still feel Hilda’s soft lips against his, and feel her warm breath. He went to bed smiling, knowing that if he could just survive to the end of this war, he could spend the rest of his life with the woman he loved.


End file.
